Fur House

A polyamorous quad shares their experiences with ethical non-monogamy

Hey, everyone! Viro here. I’ve been busy with travel and running our Open and Polyamorous Furry Relationships 101 panel at Texas Furry Fiesta, so this week we’re featuring a guest column from a happy polyamorous quad who took the time to share their experiences with polyamory with us. I hope you all find this fresh perspective on the polyamorous lifestyle within the fandom to be as interesting and educational as I did!

What are the red flags for a toxic poly relationship?

When should you back out of a poly relationship, no matter how awesome it appears to be right now? What are the key ingredients that, if found missing, make it so that it is better to just move on and save everyone the heartbreak? Are there any red flags?

In my pack, I always get stuck doing the chores. Help!

Sorry for bothering you, but my mates and I have been having some trouble with delegating responsibilities in our day to day life such as cleaning, taking trash out, dish washing, etc.

I am OCD in having things cleaned up, so my mates and I have different definitions of what is a "mess" and I'm not sure what I should do. We can't seem to figure out a solution that is fair and that everyone is happy with.

I can clean up my own stuff and they clean up theirs, but the problem is, they are willing to let it go a bit more than what I'm comfortable with, and it bothers me. They tell me I'm just being a "neat freak" and that it's no big deal.

For example, it's unfair to me to constantly have to be the one that brings up, "Hey, we should do laundry." When I do bring up this topic, all I receive back are groans followed by procrastination.

For once I'd like to stop always having to be "that guy" that wants to do adult stuff.